A Change in the Weather

Michigan weather. There's a saying that goes something like this: "If you want to know the weather in Michigan, wait five minutes." It's true. Michigan weather changes in the blink of an eye. Winters are no exception. This roller coaster fluctuation keeps us Michiganders on our toes and was especially evident over the last week.

I have been home bound for the last thirteen days...yes, I'm counting. During this time, I have spent a great deal of quiet time simply looking outside. Let me recap the weather of the last week for you. Gale force winds. Snow. Blowing snow. Frigid temperatures. Below zero wind chills. More snow. Sleet. Freezing rain. Rain. Fog. Thunderstorms. Gusty winds. Balmy temperatures.

I witnessed all this nastiness from the safety of my home. I enjoyed an unobstructed view of this nastiness because our home is an A-frame designed with a front wall of windows overlooking the woods. While the storms brewed all around me, I was protected. Safe. No worries about the bite of the cold. No fear of a soaking from the rain. No fretting over falling limbs. I rested easy knowing that, while the storms raged around me, I was safe.

Hmmm. Protection. I realize I need more protection from life's storms than I need from weather's fickle fluctuations. I need a place of refuge. A safe haven that takes away my worries, fears and frets. Praise the Lord! I have that place. God is my ROCK, my refuge, my strength. The only action needed is mine. If I plunk down at his feet and allow him to wrap his loving arms around me, I will be protected from life's storms. Oh, those storms will still rage around me. They will howl, they will pelt, they may soak me, but they will not harm me. I am safe in the arms of my loving Father.

"The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer, my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge." Psalm 18:2

"He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." Psalm 62:2

"There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides on the heavens to help you and on the clouds in his majesty. The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms." Deuteronomy 33:26-27a

Where are you riding out the storm?

Supplication and Praise

Supplication. Pleading. Begging. Asking fervently. To God.

Praising. Glorifying. Lifting. Adoring. To God.

I have often been intrigued while reading the Psalms. I have been perplexed when David pleads earnestly to God with all his heart and suddenly praises God just a few verses later. It happens often with David. I wondered how he could flip the switch so quickly. See Psalms 22 and Psalms 28 as examples if you're not sure what I'm talking about. This past week, it clicked for me. I made a connection with David. It was really cool. Let me tell you how it happened.

Let me preface this by saying I am not looking for sympathy. I'm not asking for a pity party. The history of the week calls for some detail. Some pretty gross details. So if you can't handle gross, maybe you should skip over the next paragraph or two.

Last week, I had a tonsillectomy. Yep, at age fifty two. Now when you're five and have your tonsils out, you have a day or two of eating popsicles and ice cream and then, as if nothing happened, you're back to playing. Just like that. At fifty two? Ha! Not a chance.The doctor warned me I would hate him for two weeks. He said the pain meds would barely take the edge off. He said I would be off of work for two weeks. So how did it pan out? Have I hated him? Not a chance. Have the pain meds worked? Worse than predicted. Vomiting, nausea and near hallucinations. So not worth it. Two weeks off of work? The jury is still out on that one, but at this point, I can't even imagine having the energy to go in to work.

That's the overview. The following explains the reality of having your tonsils out at age fifty two. The day of surgery the hospital staff sends you home when you can barely function and just want to sleep. *GROSS ALERT* The twenty minute drive home was awful and I puked in my cute pink hospital bucket as we entered the garage. In the following days two and three, my throat felt as though it had been scorched and a dead animal thrown in for added bonus. The mucus/saliva/phlegm was so thick and in such great quantity that I felt at times like I was choking. Day four arrived and I thought I'd turned the corner only to have day five arrive with unmatched pain. I liken each swallow to the pain of childbirth contractions. I have a high pain tolerance, but this pain broke me.

Now you understand the place I was at this week. This is where, like David, my prayers of supplication took over. Normally, I am not a selfish pray-er, but this week, I prayed for myself. I prayed for me. I prayed, I begged, I cried out to the Lord for healing and for pain relief. I asked him for strength. I pleaded for mercy. And then, God brought my attention to him. I looked outside, and it was as if a switch flipped. My unmatched view out our two story wall of windows put me in a snow globe. The remarkable silent beauty was evident in the snowballed pine branches. The gentle flutter of snow mesmerized me. And it was then that I began praising God. I praised him for his greatness. I praised him for his gentleness. I praised him for his immense presence in my life.

God turned my "me" eyes into God eyes this week. He transposed my supplication into praise. He met me right here where I am. I finally understand David. Oh, my problems only are an inch in the mile of David's woes, but I get it. It only took fifty two years and a removed pair of tonsils to help me figure it out. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace."

Refrain of Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus by Helen Lemmel

Backseat Driver

My son, Barry, is a Hope College student. As with most college students, he looks for ways to save money to help pay for tuition. One way he does this is by keeping his Grand Prix in storage during the academic year. His lack of transportation affords us the occasional opportunity to be in the car together, grabbing lunch or running errands. On these occasions, he occupies the passenger seat while I drive. While I am by no means a perfect driver, I am usually gracious and think I'm fairly intelligent in my driving ability. Despite my experience, Barry usually chimes in on lane choices, best route directions and speed, or lack thereof. We often joke about his extraordinary talent as a "backseat" driver.

Most folks I know have a tendency to desire control during travel. Even though we may know our destination, and be in the hands of a dependable driver, we need to have some say, or input, into the way and direction of the ride. The desire for control also extends beyond travel. We want control over most of our experiences. Work. Family. Daily routine. Life.

Over the last few days, I have been praying for direction. This week, I was asked to step into a mentoring role. While I know that I am ill-equipped for the role of mentor, past experience has shown me that God provides just what I need, when I need it, if I step out in faith, listening and following his lead. So as I prayed. I asked God what my response should be. Yes? No? As I prayed, I felt God asking me to dig into the Scripture for my response. So I prayed, "Where should I turn?" The answer was Matthew 16 and Ephesians 4.

I don't always hear such a clear response to prayer. So with excitement, I pulled out my copy of The Message and turned to Matthew 16. I laughed aloud as I saw the title of the last section. "You're Not in the Driver's Seat."  Message received. I need to relinquish control. Part of the passage reads as follows:

"Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat; I am."

And in case I was confused about whether I was paying attention to the right part of the passage, I turned to Ephesians 4. Bingo!

"...I want you to get out there and walk-better yet, run! - on the road God called you to travel. I don't want any of you sitting around on your hands. I don't want anyone strolling off, down some path that goes nowhere. And mark that you do this with humility and discipline-not in fits and starts, but steadily, pouring yourselves out for each other in acts of love..."

And then, "You were all called to travel on the same road and in the same direction, so stay together, both outwardly and inwardly."

Two passages that clearly talk about navigating the road of life. Two passages that tell me God is in control. And clearly, from Ephesians, the call to get moving, with humility, on the path he has called me take.I don't always get it right, but God patiently reminds me, over and over and over again, that he is in control. He is in the driver's seat. I am in the reliable, dependable hands of the driver of my life. He has the route laid out in front of me. I just need to relinquish control.

No backseat driving. Easier said then done.

A Change of Plans

I am a planner. I like to plan out my day. I like to plan out my week. Sometimes, I even plan out into the next year. While I love order in my life, sometimes I lose out on the joy of the spontaneous by being such a planner. I also run a huge risk of being derailed from my route when the unexpected happens. Such was the case this week when the unexpected crossed paths with the downright frightening.

Normally for my family, Sundays don't require planning. Sundays are predictably predictable. Early morning finds my husband and I reading our local newspaper while we enjoy our morning cup of coffee. Mid morning, we head to church for worship and fellowship. By noon we are back home to enjoy a leisurely afternoon of napping, relaxing and occasionally, for me, crafting.

This past Sunday, we followed our usual routine. After church, I changed into my comfy sweatpants and ratty sweatshirt. I was starting to make lunch when my phone rang. My caller ID registered "Mom." When I answered the call, the voice I heard on the other end was not my mom, but my aunt. My aunt had stopped to visit with my mom and had found her on the floor by her bed. The paramedics were there. My mom was breathing, but in bad shape.

As the reality of my aunt's words sunk in, I sprang into action. My daughter, Lorie, staying with us during her break, attempted to keep me calm, but I still sped the entire way to my mom's condo. We live about twenty minutes away and the drive seemed to take an eternity. As we pulled into the main condo drive, the parade of emergency vehicles turned out. Ambulance. Rescue unit. Fire truck. Volunteer firefighter vehicles. We did a u-turn and followed the ambulance to the hospital. Upon arrival at the emergency entrance, I was a bit frightened by the gray pallor of my mom's complexion, but the medics assured me she was stable.

After hours in emergency and countless tests, swabs and x-rays, the ER doctor informed us that mom tested positive for influenza A and they would continue to run various tests to rule out other issues. There was no question: she would be admitted. It was several more hours before she was wheeled up to the intermediate care unit. She was hooked up to IVs, oxygen and monitors.

Within a day, she seemed to perk up and make great progress only to deteriorate the following day. Her failing health was attributed to an additional diagnosis of pneumonia, then bronchitis. It was tough seeing mom struggle both physically and mentally. This week has been a roller coaster affair of gains and setbacks, highs and lows, fears and frustrations. Although she remains in the hospital, she is definitely on the road to recovery.

When I look back to Sunday, I could never have predicted the course of events this week would take. In fact, most of the plans I made for this week went by the wayside. Instead, my week was filled with hospital visits, daily calls to my far away sisters, chats with doctors and nurses and distracted hours at work. Through it all, I felt God's presence, close beside me. He was there in the kind words of coworkers. He was there in the phone calls from friends and family. He was there in the "chance" encounters of the week. He carried mom and he carried me.  

Jeremiah 29: 11-12 is a favorite passage for many folks. Today it comes to mind in a fresh way:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you."